July 17, 2011

Reese's Stuffed Crescent Rolls

You might be getting bored with my vacation stories.
I'm sorry.
But a change of scenery tends to get the creative juices flowing.
So, yes, I apologize about all this vacation talk, but this story must be told...

As you all know I am allergic to exercise.
It's a pretty severe allergy.
I carry an EpiPen for it and everything.
But when I am on vacation I like to try and shake things up a bit.  You know, live on the edge.
So when the resort pool offered up "Water Aerobics" my friends and I decided, "Why the heck not?"
I mean it's exercise without sweating or gravity...2 things that I have decided make exercise much too difficult.
Sign. Mah. UP!!

Here's how it went down:
Got to the pool where the class was being held.
I instantly felt young and fit.
My friends and I brought the average age of the class down by 40 years or so.
There is definitely something to doing water jumping jacks while sandwiched in between an elderly woman and a man with large man-breasts to elevate your self-esteem.
Next our instructor made her appearance.
For the sake of anonymity we will call her Sherry.  Ok, that was her name, but something tells me she's not reading this...more on that later...

Sherry was a head turner.  She strolled in wearing her swimsuit and a smile.
Bless her heart.
The one thing that made Sherry unique, however was that Sherry...our Sherry...
Jesus strike me down, but Sherry had one penis too many to be wearing a bikini.
Sherry wore a fabulously bedazzled suit, wedge sandals...I assume to enhance her feminine calves...and a  toe ring.  The end.

I still don't know why Sherry wore that, clearly custom made, bikini...because she didn't get in the water.
She did all the very bendy exercises without the blessed camouflage of the water.
Her splits, her leg lifts, her high kicks are now cemented in my mind as clear as the day of my first son's birth.
Some thing's stay with you for a lifetime.
Thank you for that, Sherry.
Sherry also competes in body building competitions.
I know this because she didn't stop talking about it.
Or flexing.
Flexing apparently is a large part of her day.
 That and making chicken burgers.
Maybe flexing while preparing the chicken burgers.
She told us that she didn't want to eat turkey because there is more estrogen in the turkey.
I'm not thinking that would be a problem.
But hey, different strokes, different folks.

But Sherry had me working my flabby tush in that pool next to Father Time harder than I have worked in a while.
She was a drill sergeant, that Sherry.
And after it was all said and done she made us chant.
You know what we had to chant?
"Bread is bad"
That is how I know Sherry is not reading this.
Bread is bad is pretty counter-intuitive to what I am doing here.

So, in Sherry's honor today I will make an easy dessert that makes me chant, "Bread is good".
Especially when it is stuffed with Reese's Cups.
Sorry Sherry, but thanks for the memories.
 You'll need:
4 Reese's Cups
1 package Crescent Rolls (makes 8)
parchment paper
powdered sugar for sifting
Here's how you do it:
Cut your Reese's Cups in half and starting from the top and loosely roll your Crescents.
Remember to pinch the sides closed so the chocolate doesn't melt out.
Bake on a parchment lined baking sheet according to package directions.
(I baked for 8 minutes)
When they are done sprinkle with powdered sugar.
They are best served warm.
Hope you have a great week!


Bakers are born, not made. said...

mmmmmm these look yummy!

Amy from She Wears Many Hats said...

Oh my dear one ... you've just opened the door for endless possiblities around here. My hiney will never be the same.

Sylvie @ Gourmande in the Kitchen said...

Oh do I wish I could have been there to see that!

jennifer / my little adventures said...

clever and combines two of my favorite things! i need to get myself some crescent rolls stat! :)

BigBearswife said...

haha I love your story! I don't think sherry and I would get along lol

Nichole said...

I just recently started following your blog and I love your recipes but have to scroll by them because I'm currently kitchen-less and seeing delicious baked treats just makes me really sad. However, I still check your blog with every new post because they make me laugh pretty much every time.

Just wanted to let you know you do a great job!

Kristan said...

Oh to have been a fly on the wall of that class....I would have DIED.


This recipe is genius. :)

SprinkleBakes said...

I cannot stop laughing at the "one too many..." Seriously!!

The Reese's crescent rolls are so literally filled with awesomeness... I can hardly stand it. Genius!

Lori said...

I don't think I've laughed so hard in a while! Thanks for that image that is seared into my brain! The treats look YUMMY!!!

Trina Rae said...

You. Are. HILARIOUS. Now, whenever I see a female body builder or a rhinestone bikini (both things I don't see a lot of, thank goodness) I will think of you between the elderly people in that pool. Thank you ever so much.

Oh, the recipe looks scrumptious, by the way. :o)

staci @ lizard n ladybug said...

I won't be able to get the image out of my mind. If I chant 'bread is good' while eating these delicious treats, I may be able to forget about "Sherry" for a while :)

Dana said...

I thank Sherry, she obviously inspired this totally yummy recipe. YAY SHERRY!!!! ;)

Kim said...

Ha ha. I love this story. My friend and I do water aerobics on a regular basis (pretty much because we also hate gravity and sweating). Thank God our instructor doesn't act like yours did. I don't think I could handle the chanting and all that.

I love these reese stuffed crescents. My 10 year old would love making these.

P.S. It certainly takes a brave woman to do all the exercises on land wearing only a bathing suit. Yikes!

Katrina {In Katrina's Kitchen} said...

Really - tears in my eyes. WAY too funny!

Dorothy @ Crazy for Crust said...

Oh, this is hilarious. Thank you for the laugh! And, it's meant to be, this recipe, because I have several pounds of peanut butter cups left from a party where no one ate any. !!!! Now I have another recipe to try. :)

Lotte Lu and Brother Too said...


I love anything wrapped in crescent rolls. I love resees. I can't imagine how fan-freakin-tastic they will be together!

Mamie said...

I love your stories! I just read this aloud to my mother, who is a water arobics drop out, and she just laughed and laughed! She thinks that you need to write a book. You are truly funny.

ChiTown Girl said...

These are just wrong! Almost as wrong as Sherry's penis...0_0

lilashiepoo said...

I don't know which I enjoyed more, the story or the recipe. That's the kind of thing that only happens in movies.

Trish - Sweetology101 said...

YUMEEEE....Somehow I think it would be easier to work out with your Sherry than my group fitness instructor "Sherry" whose DDDDDDDD++++++ boobies and size 00 butt make me want to crawl in a Reese's crescent roll and never come out from the flaky covers.....

SweetSugarBelle said...

Eclairs!!!! Im dying laughing...bernie KNEW I was not reading email...reading it out loud now!

Vimitha Anand said...

These look so yummy and perfect for a party...

Tami B. said...

I'm still laughing! I don't know what's better your story or the evil decadence you've submitted us to once again.
My son walked past while I was reading this & without missing a beat or slowing down said "oooo, you need to make some of those!"

Joy @ Joy Of Desserts said...

LOL. Bread is good ... bread is good ... bread is good ... bread is good!
I just had to do a counter chant with you. :-)
Your recipe is so easy, but I can just taste it right through the computer screen. This is great!

Maris(In Good Taste) said...

better then chocolate croissants

Lauren at Keep It Sweet said...

OMG I have way too many visuals from that story lol! You are so funny. These, on the other hand, are amazing!

Elizabeth L in Apex, NC said...

I totally needed to start my birthday with a ROFL blog post - thanks for obliging!! (And can't wait to psych my kids with the recipe for breakfast one day this week.



Erin said...

Oh my heck! YUM!!!!!

Sue said...

You are one of a kind, Shelly!:)

These look way too easy and WAY TOO GOOD!!!

Farrah's Kitchen said...

Easy, adorable and HAS to be delicious!

Joanne said...

I truly think that only you (and Father Time) could possibly encounter a Sherry while on vacation. Amazing.

Georgia Pellegrini said...

This is quite possibly the most wonderfully naughty treat I've seen in quite a while missy ;)

Kate H.(www.sprinkletherapy.blogspot.com) said...

Ha ha Oh Sherry! These are so simple, yet so creative (:

Pink Little Cake said...

You are hilarious!!!! I am always looking forward for you stories and post, this one is one of the winners!

nettielovesfood said...

I am so excited that I was introduced to your blog through a friend today. You're a crack-up, and a girl after my own heart. I can't wait to try these. Thanks!

Weeny said...

Oh God... my tongue just fell out of my mouth. As would my eyes had I seen Sherry haha!! Love reading your blog; always get excited when I see you have a new post :)

Cristin (Pinkie) said...

Oh my gosh I could not stop laughing! This was hilarious! Thanks for sharing. I have to try this fun recipe!

Anonymous said...

omg.....LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't stop laughing...best blog post EVER.

Anonymous said...

That was SO funny! You description is priceless and I don't know how you were able stand it! Thank you, THANK YOU!

Jocelyn said...

bbbwwwwwhhhhaaa!!! the mental picture I have now is not pretty!!!! I must have some bread to get rid of it...with extra reeses;-)

nicole / Twitter: BTHM1 said...

Just so you know, I consider you EVIL. It's LATE LATE at night and I'm trying to remember if we have crescent rolls in the house, cause I know we have the reeses and sugar and am wondering if I can make these and NOT wake anyone up....SIGH..
BAD blogger. LOL

dawnn said...

Thanks for the laugh!

Sanjeeta kk said...

Oh..I love the idea of stuffing the cresents with Reeses.

bridget {bake at 350} said...

Shelly....I love you.

"As you all know I am allergic to exercise.It's a pretty severe allergy.
I carry an EpiPen for it and everything."

I think we might be twins.

PS...I started a water aerobics class last week. It's done in a "lazy river" which sounded just about my speed. Except you walk AGAINST the current and do lunges and all of that. It's HARD.

I think I need a crescent roll.

Kristen said...

I have tears rolling down my face I am laughing so hard. Oh my goodness. Glad you shared THIS vacation story with us, for sure!

burlapntwine said...

I think I just fell in love with you. I haven't read a blog post this freakin funny in a long time. Thanks! I'm going to link this post up to my blog

Gene said...

You don't seem like a hateful person. Do you really want to add to the chorus saying trans women are laughable?

Some of your readers are trans, and they're going to come across this. Would you really want to ruin someone's day like that?

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